jawbreaker
the stories.
Throughout the development of this project we've gathered great amounts of data about the anxieties that come with being young, being an artist, or just being human. Here we want to honour all of those (anonymous or not) that helped us craft these stories by telling us their own.
"what frightens me the most about the art industry is as a female creative i worry i will never be taken as seriously as my male competitors and will be looked over whilst apply for jobs. I struggle daily with my identity as a creative, uni did help me grow as a person but creatively i change my mind all the time and still struggle to tell people what ‘my practise’ is. Making art is both a coping mechanism and a reason for my struggle to identify myself, it’s bitter sweet, when i’m being productive and creating great art i feel amazing, but when i hit a creative wall or take a break from creating i feel intense pressure that i’m not being productive enough and that my degree/ career choice isn’t worth it. The future is 100% un certain both due to that fact that i am in the creative industry and because i am a young person in our very unstable political climate. I think ‘millennials’ especially art graduates are sort of tossed to that back of the pile because people don’t think we studied a ‘real’ degree and aren’t worth the go cements time or money."
JESS NICHOLAS (STARRING) CURATOR, PHOTOGRAPHER, ARTIST
I only realised late into my time at college that I wanted to do ´art´. Before this I had been discouraged from following a serious path in anything creative - I was semi-forced to persue more academic subjects like physics and maths. After not doing well at these I finally decided I just needed to follow what I wanted to do, and worry about creating a career and making money out of it later.
Since being at an art uni, I haven´t had any direct opposition to art as a career, but more the personal standards other students have, have led me to criticise and change my own art direction, which I feel is both good and bad.
JACK HOUNSELL (STARRING) PHOTOGRAPHER, MUSICIAN, ARTIST
Does the future seem uncertain? In short, yes - extremely. Every day I think about how I don't have a clue what I wan't to do with my life in the long run, but every day that same prospect excites me. I think I'd hate to properly have my career planned out; I enjoy the unpredictability and sponteneity of it. Who would want to have their whole life planned out? Concurrently, I´m scared shitless that I'll never get my life together, but I guess that's the life that you choose being a creative - you've just got to see what happens :) :) :): ) :):):):):):):))
KIERAN PANCHAL, FILMMAKER, MUSICIAN, PHOTOGRAPHER, ARTIST
What most frightens you about the industry that you’re in?
What frightens me is to see how, in some cases, it’s believed that trends are more important than essence. This is an industry of constant change and sometimes the core of what’s important is shaken. It’s not technology or innovation. All of this needs to be applied to what really matters, that is emotionally connecting with the audience, if that doesn’t happen, you have nothing.
Have you ever struggled to find your identity?
All the time. In fact, it’s very difficult to plan your identity, it’s something you see reflected in your work and generally can only be appreciated after having perspective. After having done a lot of work, you can start seeing yourself reflected on it. However, you always have to try and include a personal perspective to your work (whatever it is) nothing connects better with people than authenticity.
Would you consider your art as a coping mechanism
Coping mechanism sometimes means necessary for survival. In that case, of course.
Have you faced any opposition about your career path?
Luckily I’ve never felt that. Everyone around me was supportive from friends and family to colleagues. At the same time I feel it’s easy to support a field of work that gives you a stable monetary compensation. If I hadn’t chosen Advertising, I wouldn’t know what my family’s position would have been.
Does the future seem uncertain? Do you prefer it?
The future will always be uncertain. To do a good job, you have to be curious and that implies always looking forward. Even to prevent reactions from the audience, and have your answers ready. But what’s most important when building a message is being extremely connected to the present. And I think it’s the best for life too.
TOMÁS OSTIGLIA, CREATIVE DIRECTOR, MUSICIAN, FILMMAKER, ARTIST
Surely, classical ballet was the way in which I found myself able to speak. Growing up I was extremely insecure when it came to expressing myself to the world around me. However, as soon as I entered my ballet class, no words were necessary, and that in a way was a relief for me. I could feel heard by my movements and not my words. Today, I think my love for ballet was really a necessary source to help me cope with all I was unable to speak.
Choosing an artistic career is often seen as a courageous act, since it is a competitive sector and commonly related to financial instability. However, for me, I was lucky enough to have people who believed in me and supported me until the end. I cannot and will never take that for granted. So my biggest opposition was in fact myself. Again, as I mentioned before, just like ballet was a way to avoid my insecuties, to persue such path was challenging due to my insecurity. I was the one who created my own opposition.
NATASHA LIBERMAN, DANCER
What most frightens you about the industry that you’re in? Does the future seem uncertain? Do you prefer it? The "future" has been remarkably different from what I expected growing up and dreaming of becoming a professional musician. I always expected that all the technology we had available then would simply improve, upgrade. We used to record to tape. Tape was an analogous medium, it would simulate the sounds we would record. Tape also had a lot of hiss, wow and flutter. I simply expected those things to improve over time. Instead we now record digitally (through zeros and ones) into a computer software. Even though people will try and convince you that the sound is quite different, it actually isn't. The two formats are quite similar when it comes to the final results. What has changed is the way we produce the music, through the use of plugins and their algorithms. Producers and recording engineers can tune a singer who sings out of tune. They may correct a drummer who played offbeat. At whim, they may change the key, meter and style of the recorded piece. Since softwares are relatively cheap, anyone can be a record producer, musician and sound engineer. Musicians now have to know how to use these softwares, record and mix. All modern musicians are altering the original performances through softwares. Most modern music sounds very similar to me. I fear that music will become something anybody can do through the use of these new algorithms. Talent will no longer matter as long as you can manipulate the softwares and their plugins. Technology is not to blame. What worries me is our needy demand to feel special, to intervene and modify reality and these algorithms which help us veil our insecurities. Currently I dream of music which is sometimes out of tune, out of beat,; imperfect, yet filled with magic, awesomeness and soul.
CHRISTIAAN OYENS, MUSICIAN, ARTIST
JULIE MARSH, ACADEMIC, MEDIA PRACTICIONER, FILMMAKER ARTIST
What most frightens you about the industry that you’re in? I feel less apprehensive now, but after I graduated I was scared about how I would live and support myself as an artist filmmaker. Being non-commercial meant that I was torn between using my practice as financial support and doing what I really love and maintaining integrity. I felt pressure to get a ‘proper job’ whatever that means and struggled with this for a number of years. I sit outside of the industry and that is scary as I have to fight constantly for funding, support and a platform to exhibit. Have you ever struggled to find your identity? Yes, for many years I thought you had to fit into a creative role. Then I realized that it was a positive to have a multi-skilled portfolio and ended up writing 3 different CV’s, artist, filmmaker and academic. Now I have the confidence to have a single CV that marries all three aspects. Would you consider your art as a coping mechanism? Yes, art has always been there for me, supporting me and inspiring me. It has given me a foundation and purpose in life and I have often used it as an emotional outlet. Have you faced any opposition about your career path? No Does the future seem uncertain? Do you prefer it? I feels flexible and I love that.
What most frightens you about the industry that you’re in?
I feel like the photography industry has taken over the world. It seems to be everywhere and that’s pretty scary! I believe there’s a important responsibility on my behalf to be a part of work that makes me grow as a person and teaches me of the world. However, it worries me thinking about this growing industry and where photography will take me as a person. At times I feel pretty unsure about my place in this industry, and whether I’ll be happy both outwardly and mentally as I pursue it as a career.
I try to highlight beauty and truth when I take images, but sometimes the pressure to take more powerful and communicative images can loom over me. I want to inform people of the good and bad things of our world, but it all seems a bit of a blur to me at the moment. The world is a mess, and using a photography as a tool to bring change feels impossible. Maybe the future will be better who knows, I guess through photography we can find out.
